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Subject: Things you DON'T want to hear while on the operating room table

Things you DON'T want to hear while on the operating room table

Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop
Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness
Bo! Bo! Comeback with that! Bad Dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?
Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie
Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.
Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
Damn, there go the lights again...
Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em.
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off
What's this doing here?
I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!
I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses.
Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
Sterile, schmerile. The floor's clean, right?
What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change...!
Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape.
OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
What do you mean "You want a divorce"?!?
She's gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!
Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!


	Fiction
Fiction L A Fake Internet Presence, since 1994 Home TidBits BLong Source GBuffy Mutt ClearSilver Python PyApache PalmOS Tools Neotonic	From: Subject: Things you DON'T want to hear while on the operating room table Things you DON'T want to hear while on the operating room table Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy. Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness Bo! Bo! Comeback with that! Bad Dog! Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that? Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie Oh no! I just lost my Rolex. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before? Damn, there go the lights again... Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, the guy's got two of 'em. Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off What's this doing here? I hate it when they're missing stuff in here. That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?! I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses. Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us. Sterile, schmerile. The floor's clean, right? What do you mean he wasn't in for a sex change...! Anyone see where I left that scalpel? And now we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape. OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature. This patient has already had some kids, am I correct? Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card? Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough. What do you mean "You want a divorce"?!? She's gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!! FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out! Damn! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
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